With Dry July fast approaching, you might be looking at your relationship with alcohol in a new light. Or you might not – because you’ve never really thought to, right? Whatever the case may be, there are some surprising reasons as to why you should drink less alcohol. Reasons you can only really understand if you chat to someone who has experienced it firsthand.
Isabella Walker is a Gold Coast local. She’s a business owner, has her own podcast and is passionate about yoga and EFT tapping. Oh, and when she was only 23, she gave up drinking for a whole year (and then some). The experience shaped her more than she could have ever anticipated.
Can you tell us a bit about how your sobriety journey started?
I started getting curious towards the end of 2020, coming up to my 24th birthday. I had been drinking a lot post-lockdown. I found any excuse to celebrate my business being back open, supporting all the local bars and restaurants going out more and just socialising after so many months of not being able to.
I didn’t think I had a problem with alcohol, but I did find myself getting into a pattern of looking forward to the weekends to be social, see friends and have a drink. I noticed myself feeling way less motivated for the work week ahead come Monday and would often take a few days to feel strong in the gym again and wake up with energy. Then before I knew it, it was the weekend again. I remember thinking to myself at one point that I couldn’t recall the last weekend I had off drinking or spent at home with no events. I decided to take a month off just to challenge myself and that was my beginning…
What were your main reasons for wanting to give up drinking? And did you have any concerns?
When I had my first month off, I wanted to challenge myself to not say yes to every opportunity to have a drink. I was worried I would feel socially awkward or ‘miss out’ if I didn’t go out one weekend and I was even a bit worried I’d miss out even if I was at the dinner or catch up – without a drink! The crazy thing was, every time I turned down a drink, I felt more empowered and stronger within myself. Each time it got easier, and I became prouder to say no instead of ashamed or embarrassed, worried what people might think.
I finished my month off and then decided to set a much bigger, scarier challenge… a full year off. The reasons as to why were similar – just on a larger scale. I felt like I was being a bit strategic with the month I chose to have off in September, because I didn’t have any events, friends’ birthdays or weddings. Setting the year-long goal was my way of dedicating the next year to being 100 percent focused on me. No hangovers as excuses, no bottle of self-soothing to pour at the end of a stressful day or liquid confidence at the bar talking to new people.
I was nervous, partly because I was worried I would eventually cave and ‘fail’ my goal. But there was this part of me that just knew this was exactly what I needed, so I began on January 5, 2021.
How did people react when you told them you were going to stop drinking? Did you feel any judgment or receive any comments that stuck with you?
To begin with, I didn’t tell many people I was going to do a full year off. Because I had just done the month off only a few months prior, I had already witnessed firsthand how some friends had changed around me simply because I wasn’t drinking for that month. I had a few less invites to dinners and only got check in texts asking when I was back drinking so we could book in a catch up. Some were just straight up confused – I didn’t look like I had an issue with alcohol, so why would I do something so drastic? That was just a few of course. Most of my friends and even people I’d meet for the first time out were so supportive and it didn’t change a thing!
As the months went on and I would hit new milestones: 50 days ✅; a friend’s birthday dinner ✅; work drinks ✅; six months ✅; and stressful days finished with sleep instead of a wine ✅. I started feeling proud and, day by day, cared significantly less (down to 0) what other people thought. By the end of my ‘year off’ journey I started posting here and there on Instagram when I had hit another month off the grog. I would always get a flood of replies from people asking me what the pros and cons were and telling me they felt inspired to maybe try too.
Were there any surprising pros/cons once you started?
For me, the pros far outweighed any of the slight cons. I sometimes would describe it as driving with a slightly dirty windshield. Not dirty enough that you can’t see out of it, you think it’s perfectly fine. Then you turn on the wipers and everything becomes crystal clear, and you think to yourself why didn’t I do that sooner?!
Life became easier. Non-existent hangovers meant I couldn’t keep using them as an excuse to leave the washing ‘til tomorrow or skip the gym to catch up on sleep. I followed through with Sunday commitments I made for myself as well as others. I ate healthier more often because I actually had the energy to cook instead of ordering Uber Eats. And I saved money by catching up with friends for walks and coffees as opposed to dinners and endless nights of $25 cocktails.
Of course, there were some cons I had to navigate. I didn’t realise how much I relied on an alcoholic beverage on arrival to an event to feel social and fun. There were some really tough, stressful days I had to feel and work through instead of being able to numb them with a wine and gossip with a girlfriend. And there were celebrations that I thought I HAD to have a champagne for to, you know, celebrate?
But it turns out after the first 10 minutes or so at an event, it does get easier. You thank yourself the next day after a good night’s sleep, ready to take on the stressful situation with a clear mind and no pounding headache. Oh, and yeah, you can actually just celebrate with saying congratulations! (This one was a tough one for me, haha!).
What is your relationship with alcohol like now?
So, I decided to have a drink after 430 days off. Now I find myself drinking significantly less often and consuming less on the occasions that I do drink. I wanted a reset, to break the habit of saying yes at every opportunity and see what it’s like to get through all kinds of days and situations without having a sip. Having that time off has shown me that I actually don’t ‘need’ it.
When the feeling of wanting a glass comes up, I make a very conscious decision by checking in with myself and my intention in that moment. Am I feeling stressed and want to escape? Do I feel awkward right now? Am I feeling sad or down? If I am answering even slightly ‘yes’ or ‘maybe’ to those few questions, I know there are far better options I can choose (that are actually going to help) and I opt for a mocktail. If I’m feeling good, with some great friends or family and just want to enjoy a glass of wine or champagne, I do. More often than not, I choose to try the mocktails and love testing out all the non-alcoholic wine options now!
What would you say to someone considering going sober?
If you’re considering it, you’re halfway there already! Start small – a weekend off is huge for someone who is out most weekends, or a work week if you love an knockoff drink whilst cooking or winding down. Don’t feel like you need to do a full month or year for it to be ‘worth it’. Your body will thank you and you will be thanking yourself!
I’d recommend you read or listen to some books like:
- ‘The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober’ by Catherine Gray
- ‘Quit Like a Woman’ by Holly Glenn Whitaker
- Any by Annie Grace
- ‘Drinking Games’ by Sarah Levy
Once I educated myself on the science behind alcohol, it was pretty hard to unhear and is super motivating!
Where are your favourite places to grab a non-alcoholic drink on the Gold Coast? Especially on a night out?
Rick Shores has great mocktails that take after classic cocktails, so they look super chic (without an umbrella poking out the top!). You can also just ask for whichever cocktail takes your fancy, sans spirit – most bartenders will do that for you now, which is awesome.
And the old faithful when at a late-night bar or club for the vibes (but not the hangover) – a short glass soda water with lime. Looks like a vodka lime soda, and a good bartender shouldn’t charge!
Woolworths has so many great mocktail pre-mix options now to try at home, too!